Mama Diaries

Tuesday, September 2, 2014

Party Planning

It's almost time for my daughter's birthday.  And she has some big ideas for her party.  She's spent hours on her iPod, looking at party themes and decorating ideas.

"Mom," she said yesterday.  "I've got it figured out.  Here's what we need:  First thing is a cabin."

I tried not to have a heart attack.  "A cabin?  We have to buy a cabin?"

"No," she explained.  "Just rent one.  Then we'll decorate it.  Look at these cool pictures."  She showed me a pink carpet walkway lined with carved pink and white painted pumpkins leading to the door.  Pink and silver balloons were hanging everywhere.  Inside were more pink and silver balloons along with some pretty fancy lighting and a professional-looking Channel cake.

"Seriously?" I said.  "Do you have any idea of how much that will cost?"

"What's my budget?" she asked.

"Definitely not  enough to cover that!" I replied.

She looked disappointed. "Oh.  I was hoping to hire a DJ, too."


(So we'll have this party with twenty of her friends at our house.  We'll decorate the basement with pink and silver balloons.  And we'll crank up the music real loud.  We'll even have a manicure station so the ladies can paint their nails. And maybe, if she's really lucky, I'll get a pink carpet, roll it down the driveway and carve out a bunch of pumpkins to plop down next to it.)

Friday, August 29, 2014

Versatile Blogger Award

 Kristen Smith nominated me for the Versatile Blogger Award.  Thank you so much, Kristen!

I have received this award many times, and shared things about me.  This time I'm going to do something a little different.  I'm going to share some things on my bucket list.  Here's what I want to do, that I haven't yet done:

1.  Sky dive.  (I almost did it this summer, but the weather wasn't so good.  I didn't think it would be a great idea to jump out of an airplane in the middle of a thunderstorm!)

2.  Zip-line (ideally through a Costa Rican rain forest.)

3.  Go white water rafting.

4.  Dive the Great Barrier Reef.  (Can you believe I haven't done that?)

5.  Set foot on all the continents.

6.  Visit all fifty states.

7.  Learn to speak French fluently.  (I can read a fair amount, but I'm really pathetic when it comes to speaking it!)

8.  Watch a shuttle launch.

9.  Learn to tango.  (I like to dance.  Trouble is, I don't have a partner to dance with.  Any volunteers?)

10.  Ride a Gondola in Venice, Italy.

11.  Ride an elephant. (I don't know why, but this seems like a cool thing to do.)

12.  Go on an African Safari.

13.  Visit Machu Picchu.

14.  Tour the White House.

15.  Take a helicopter ride over Kauai.

16.   See a performance at the Sydney Opera House.

17.  Hold a  Koala bear.

18.  Visit Area 51 and see if there are really aliens there.

19.  Visit Mount Rushmore.

20.  Tour the Neuschwanstein Castle.

I'm not tagging anyone, because I'm obviously not following any rules on this game.  I think you're supposed to list 15 things about yourself, and then tag 15 people to do the same.  If you want to do that, go ahead.  Or if you want to do my version, feel free.

What's on your bucket list?

Thursday, August 28, 2014

A Little Night Fun

Last night, there were a lot of kids over at my house.  Everybody seemed to be getting along just fine, so I went about my business doing whatever it is I do.

A short while later, I heard screaming. And it seemed to be coming from outside.  I had to investigate.  What I found was a bunch of kids and a dog chasing a beam of light around the yard.

It was the flashlight game. Five kids and a very large German Shepherd (Schultz)  were bumping into each other, in a crazed frenzy, trying to catch this light.

I shook my head and watched.

Ten minutes later, and completely exhausted, they all marched into the house.

"I supposed you all want a bowl of water now," I said.

Six panting creatures with their tongues sticking out looked at me expectantly.

So I put out five soup bowls and one very large dog bowl filled with water and let them slurp it up.

(Fortunately, it was only Schultz who dribbled the water onto the floor.)

Wednesday, August 27, 2014

Conversation with a Frog

The other day, I took my daughter to a new frozen yogurt place.  In front of the store, was a person in a frog costume. (The name of the place has something to do with a frog.)  Since I'm a little crazy, I struck up a conversation with this individual.  Here's how it went:

Me:  "It's like 95 degrees out here.  You must be roasting!"

Frog:  *Big nod*  (I was surprised his head didn't fall off.)

Me:  "You should really go inside and cool off.  A little frozen yogurt might be nice, too."

Frog:  *Another nod.  Then a shrug.*

Me:  "I'm going to get myself some ."

Frog:  *Thumbs up sign*

I went inside and got two cups of frozen yogurt - one for me and one for my daughter.

I came back out and resumed my conversation.

Me:  "See, you're doing such a good job of advertising, that I got some.  It's good!"

Frog:  *Claps hands*

Me:  "Do you want some?"

Frog:  *Shakes head*

Me:  "Okay.  See ya.  Have a nice day!"

Frog:  *Waves bye*

Meanwhile, my daughter was trying to hide, because of course I was embarrassing her.

"Mom," she said when I was done.  "Didn't your mom ever tell you not to talk to strangers?"

I nodded.  "Yes.  But she didn't say anything about frogs!"


Sunday, August 24, 2014

Moose Fat

"Mama," my ten-year-old son said. "Did you know moose fat makes things taste better?"

I nearly choked on my roast beef sandwich when I heard that news.  "No, Bubba.  I had no idea."

"It's true.  There's a Canadian Survival show that says if you add moose fat to anything, it'll taste better."

"Does it work on Brussels sprouts?" I asked.

Bubba shrugged.  "Probably."  He paused for a second and then added, "You should add it to your recipes.  I bet it would make the food you cook taste much better."

Uh.  Okay.

Friday, August 22, 2014

Preposition Rap

Something a little different, today.  Since my brain is fried from lack of sleep, I'm going to give you all a taste of what my daughter does in school.  She raps.  Yep.  And not just any kind of rapping.  Prepositional rapping.  Her assignment was to create a rap using prepositions.  Here's an example of what I'm talking about.

(Yeah.  Isn't that great?  Except, isn't "is" a verb?)

So for the last two days, I've been listening to rap music as my daughter has been trying to complete her assignment.  No wonder I haven't been sleeping well!

Before I go back to sleep for the next two days, I want to share some illustrations from my upcoming picture book, Ten Zany Birds.  They're done by talented water-color illustrator, Charu Jain.

And here are the ten zany birds:

Which is your favorite?  (I like the green one the best.)

Thursday, August 21, 2014

The Klutz Alarm

I don't function very well at 5:00 in the morning.  This morning was a particularly bad start.  By 5:13 AM, I had broken a bowl, spilled yogurt all over my kitchen floor, dropped two spoons, and caused a bottle of Coke to fall out of my refrigerator on to the floor. (I made a mental note not to open that bottle.  But of course by 5:00 tomorrow morning, I will have forgotten my mental note.)

Being completely discombobulated, I neglected to awaken my son at the appropriate time.  Fortunately, the breaking and dropping of things was enough of a commotion to awaken him from his deep slumber.

He came downstairs, rubbing his eyes. "Mama, why didn't you come and wake me up?"

"Bubba, I don't think I need to.  You're already up."

He stared at me on my hands and knees, cleaning up the last of the yogurt.  "Yeah," he said.  "You're right.  The klutz alarm went off!"